Gucci Hysteria Python Bag, $3,990 at saks.com
There's a reason this bag is called the "hysteria" bag: I experience an "uncontrollable outburst of emotion or fear" at the very sight of this monstrosity. But the misogynistic undertones (Freud associated this condition with the female genitalia) are reflected in the design of the bag itself: it resembles a monstrous womb with which to suck any unsuspecting male into its vortex (note the beetle-like gold eyes at the top that narrowly look down on its prey). As a proud member of the female sex, I find myself appalled by this bag and its name, which is not only atrocious in design but also horrifying in its message. Do women need to bowl over others in order to assert their identity or sense of style? Or must everything feminine be associated with raw "hysterical" emotion? The oversized craze not only pains the back but burdens the soul. Less is more.
See below another version of this monstrosity by Miu Miu, one of my favorite labels (how tragic. Note the actual size of this bag):
Miu Miu Large Vitello Vintage Tote, $1345 at Neiman Marcus.